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This is probably the most common question that I get asked by athletes across every sport. "In practice, I'm relaxed, focused and everything seems to...

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The SETTING: A 12 and under youth hockey game

The TEAMS: Team A - Smaller, 10 & 11 year olds vs.
                    Team B - Bigger, 12 year olds
The PLOT: Team A is beating a bigger Team B, 3 -1

ACTION: Team B, as they fall behind, begins to play extremely physical, and dirty, checking from behind, slamming kids into the boards after the whistle, making lewd comments and clearly going after the opposing players, NOT the puck!

The REFS...

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The heart of being a great coach lies in the relationships that you create and develop with each and every one of your athletes. RELATIONSHIPS MOTIVATE. It's WHO you are and HOW you are with your players that dramatically affects their love of the game, how hard they work, how much they learn from you and ultimately, how well they perform for you. 

If you are trustworthy in your dealings with your athletes, fair and honest, if you "walk the talk" with them and are consistent with...

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She had been struggling for months in her performance because she cared too much. She was conscientious, had a great attitude and was an extremely hard worker in practice. She just simply over-pressured herself at competitions to do better, and as a result, always got much too tight to perform her best. At a recent high school competition, after once more putting too much pressure on herself, she had two more disappointing events, and, at the meet's conclusion, in front of all of her teammates and...

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One of the most common and performance-disrupting mental traps that athletes fall into is TRYING TOO HARD. The athlete goes into a tryout, big game or important showcase pressuring themselves to do well. This pressure is always driven by an outcome focus. "I need to win!, Prove to the coach that I should make the team or be starting, or show the college coaches who are watching that I can play at this next level," etc.

Rather than relaxing and letting the game, match or race come to them, they press and try to...

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If you really want your child to love their sport, feel good about themselves and have a good chance to go as far as possible, then one of your most important jobs besides loving them unconditionally is to NOT coach. And the one place where the most "coaching" happens is on the car ride home right after a competition.

It's on the car ride home that kids are a captive audience,
It's on the car ride home that everyone's emotions...

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